Change, Resistance, Transformation – an end-of-year ritual

“The only constant is Change.” This truism has been spoken by philosophers for thousands of years. I fully believe and embrace it. What would be the alternative? Resistance. We can choose to live in flow or in friction, the energy of resistance. There are times when that energy is required to survive, but most often we feel it when we are simply resisting the flow of change. Embracing change in our life opens the door for transformation. I want to share a ritual that I have found that helps me embrace change and transformation, and it’s perfect for this time of year.

With winter’s long nights, we have the opportunity to rest more and go inward to see what changes we choose to evolve within us and in our life. Feeling “stuck” is often the result of not releasing those ways of being that no longer serve us, thus being in resistance to the flow of change. This is a wonderful time to take inventory, release, and clear the decks for what’s to come. Grab your journal, and get comfortable with your favorite music, a cup of tea and do a review of the past year.

First, make a note of your wonderful and gratifying successes! What actions, beliefs, practices brought you the most joy? What seeds of change do you see emerging?

Next, what struggles did you encounter in the past year and what did you learn from them? Consciously release any self-judgment about these struggles. Focus on the gifts that you received.

Finally, on a separate piece of paper write the disappointments you want to release. What habits or patterns no longer serve your growth? Can you see resistance and its effects in the past year?

You may want to create a ritual with your partner or family where you each do this exploration separately and then gather to share what you discover. Make it a special occasion with candles, togetherness, and even a favorite dessert. Create ground rules together about family confidentiality, lots of loving kindness and nobody being wrong.

Share in whatever way feels best to you. One way is to first share successes, then struggles/gifts, then talk about what you each want/need to release. At the end, create a small fire and, with conscious intention, burn your list of disappointments and resistance. Then celebrate your readiness to
embrace new growth and change in your life!

Enjoy this year-end ritual as it ushers in light, hope, joy and transformation. If you have questions, please feel free to contact me at

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